My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
there is puke in my bra ... again
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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