Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
My liver just had a heart attack.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
