i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
