I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Randomize
