Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
