im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Randomize
