Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
