I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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