Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
