the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
