I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
