guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
