So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
