i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize