i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
