Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Randomize
