"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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