My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
Where is the hickey?
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
