I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
