so that wasnt chicken after all
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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