i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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