He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize