Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
