its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
