How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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