I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
