He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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