He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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