Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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