Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize