It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
