Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
