There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
