There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Randomize