we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Ladies don't puke and tell
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
