North Korea, Best Korea!
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
My breasts were aching with rage.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize