Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
