this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
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