No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
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