Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
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