why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
