I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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