never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
