sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
