We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Randomize