Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize
