I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
