hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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