those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
