butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
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